Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
At first I was confused when I woke up with shards of glass and pickle brine in my pants. But then I remembered I hung out with you last night.
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
Hahahaaa There's this one girl crying hysterically and wrapped around (i believe) her ex's leg. He's trying to shake her off without spilling his beer. This is fucking priceless.
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
Mom chose Thanksgiving to tell me the reason I am here is because she was too tired to give my dad a BJ and too drunk to make him pull out.
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
I mean, we were all drinking, but I'm pretty sure kidnapping came up.
The cop told you he couldn't let you pee. You just pulled your pants down and squared anyway and im surprised you didnt get arrested.No more drinking for you.
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
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