Saw a pregnant woman get a lap dance last night. I love the south.
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
I'm still trying to decide if it's a complement when he said "I'd like to subscribe to your daddy issues".
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
I'm currently braless eating the balls of the penis cake and drinking warm champagne. I'm 3 cats away from crazy at this point
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
I was giving this guy head and he stopped me to look me in the eyes and say "you have a gift"
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
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