I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
no. you can't hotbox the world.
At what number of girls whose last names are stored in your phone book as drinking establishments does it become excessive?
Just tried to fight the dj at cowboys because he would'nt play freebird. Pick me up now.
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
You know I think I am ok with him not moving in yet. He came over, fixed my closet, ate me out, and left. I'm now in sweats drinking coke and rum and watching new girl. This works for me.
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
Randomize
