You know the guy who poops at a party and then leaves and you go in, do your business, and come out and there are girls outside that think you pooped and no one talks to you? I'm the guy who poops before you go in, because I'm in a relationship and I hate you.
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
the girls im babysitting are trying to see how much jello they can swallow without chewing...their future boyfriends are lucky
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
Remember when I got my car stuck in my backyard?
I think it's safe to say I'm rolling my hypothetical balls off
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
Why is there multiple peanut butter and toasts stuck to the fridge door?
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
Responsible things to do when you're too hungover to get out of bed: Breast self exam.
One can only be this extremely wet once a year and I feel like I'm bitch slapping god by not using this gift he has bestowed on me.
Randomize