you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
The saltiness of my tears mix perfectly with the tequila.
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
I wish i could 80s montage me losing weight
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
I just masturbated while eating dinner. Now who's the lazy one
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
Also, I cannot stop picturing myself in a bar, 3 years from now ordering soda. Just soda. 30 pounds over weight and wearing a cat sweater. I feel like I'm heading in the wrong direction in life.
Flatmate got laid for the first time in 3 years. I'm baking a cake.
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
Shooting a bottle rocket from my penis was entirely justified. Twenty bucks is twenty buck no matter how you look at it