your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why does Thanksgiving make hot girls feel disgusting and fat girls feel horny? Its killing my prospects.
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
Either I'm a lot drunker than I thought, or he has three dicks....
I think I'm gonna have to go with the first one...
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
You told the entire smokers deck that you were blowing .08 now and anyone else willing later
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
Told the cab driver to take me to narnia last night. Turns out there's a bar called narnia on the south side of town. We are in business
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
I am downtown smoking a joint with Woody Harrelson...Because our car won't start. I will be there as soon as I can.
Randomize