I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
[insert really romantic bullshit about how much i love you and how beautiful you are so you will suck my dick tonight]
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
She thought someone was breaking in but when I said it was me she got even angrier and threw a coffee mug at my head.
I just watched a woman in a full wedding dress and veil walk out of the chinese buffet...I no longer believe I have a problem, and am afraid I am underdressed.
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
Taylor Swift needs more songs about threesomes. I'm not sure she gets me anymore.
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
Randomize