found: crazy homeless guy quoting Quagmire lines to every chick he sees. i think i win the scavenger hunt.
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
I hid a girl's boot last night so I could ransom it back this morning via the "blowjobs for boots" program.
He blew a load on his roommates pillow just to piss him off. Why did you introduce me to these people?
This santa hat i wore to the bar, served it's dual purpose as a vomit bag.
Im calling him
was mistake calling. If you drunk dial someone you deserve to choke on a tubesock. Take the advice. Always remember
They are going to name an STD after you.
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
I flashed my boobs, shit my pants, and kissed the wrong twin. I'm on a roll you don't want in on.
True life: I inadvertently fucked a whole friend group. More details to come tonight.
Randomize
