Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
Since when does a beard not count as proof of age at the liquor store?
you were eating the carrots out of my guinea pig's cage and saying that you needed them more than they ever would.
if that dog is afraid of alcohol then he's no dog of mine
I had to explain the gravity bong to my mom. Right after she pointed out I have a lot of dicks on my floor at any given moment.
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
I had phone sex with a retiree last night. This is not how I envisioned my 20s going...
There's that certain point at night when you start saying things like s'mores should be used in foreign relations. I reached it.
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
dude, there is no doorman in your lobby and the front door is locked
oh yeah, sorry he's up here at the party. coming now
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
Randomize
