Did you know that cab drivers don't take quarters for payment? They don't even like it when you ask.
We should be called the Road Head Warriors
That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
My mom is purposely blasting Shania Twain downstairs so I can't jack off.
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
I give him a gold star every time I orgasm. His room looks like he's freaking King Midas.
hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
If you can't trust the person at the taco cabana drive thru, who can you trust?!
One day he'll find out I do drugs and stop talking to me.
What will you do then?
Drugs, probably.
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
Randomize
