And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
You sent me a text calling me "cunt" while i was in the middle of dumping my bf.
So we're fucking tonight?
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
Just picture a dyson vacuum with razor blades. That's how it felt.
when I came to get Jamie there was a cop standing outside with her, made me roll down my window to tell me "she's got to go cause she won't keep her shirt buttoned"
You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
I have a big to do list for you. Number 1 - me. Number 2 - drink wine 3. Talk my ears off. 4. Me again
I'm still pretty stoned. There are mini rice cakes in my robe pocket to snack on in the shower.
You are not going to get a pat on the back from me for not fucking that 40 year old again.
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
Masturbating to the DNC live stream. Not my proudest moment
handcuff keys just fell out of my bra....wtf happened last night?
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
I'm not drunk or hungover and I don't have to work. My body is sooo confused!
Randomize
