in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
cutting back on calories before spring break by only taking shots instead of drinking actual drinks.
the diet of an alcoholic...
his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
What kind of person begs for a BJ from someone who just got their wisdom teeth out?
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
My professor just used the phrase "balls deep in your mind". My day is officially made.
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.
I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree
it happenes
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
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