And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
You were running around with scissors offering people free haircuts.
I made popcorn. Partly so the room doesn't smell like sex, and partly to apologize for the things you saw when you walked in...
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
the last time I drank tequila I ended up riding your skateboard nude down the street... so yeah, I'll have a few shots.
You started pulling out condoms from your fanny pack and threw them at all the couples on the beach
I POOPED CONFETTI TOO. Ingested unacceptable amount of it oh my god can I die from this?
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
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