so my mom just told me that she wouldnt pick me up and take us to taco bell at 3AM...
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
I woke up on a futon with 2 stolen budwiesers in my purse, 5 extra bucks, a sucker stuck to my shoe, one sock, and a stolen copy of the zombie survival guide
please tell me this is not legit
Every one of her profile pictures looks like an ad for American Apparel. Of course she has syphilis.
That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
I bought you a small gift as a preemptive apology for being a drunken slut tonight.
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
Well, I convinced myself I had a sixth toe and then I ripped it off. So I PRAY you're doing better than me.
I just ate 6 cheeseburgers with some homeless guy. Pretty epic.
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
Just because you haven’t had your UTI yet doesn’t mean you have a right to talk like Yoda
Randomize
