Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
He's drinking 50/50 vodka/water out of a camelback. Disaster would be a compliment at this point.
The ratio of last drink to last smoke is so tricky. This could go on until the booze is gone
Hooked up with a guy that looked like Dean Thomas. Mediocre at best, but I stopped myself from calling him Dean in bed. So I got that going for me.
someone stole all your weed so you told us you were planning each of our deaths
I think the highlight of my night is when I was eating a mayonnaise sandwich. drunk me was on point.
...Just hit my fuck buddy with my car.
These random guys found me. They told me not to wander in the woods and i remember saying 'am i fucking Bambi?! I'm not gonna walk into woods!' then i threw up.
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
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