I am going to be in the room whjen you have your first child and spit on its face before its even all the way out of you.
dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
your all-time low pick up line was when you asked a girl "Are you rock-staring at me?"
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
ok, my life is complete.... the cops AND the paramedic just made a Mean Girls reference...
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
He came into your room last night to tell me he was leaving, when I woke up this morning he was facedown in your hallway. He didn't make it very far.
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
I'm calling in my "fuck at anytime anywhere" card. Meet me at my place in 20 min, wear your Waldo costume.
On Wednesday I'm putting wine in a water bottle and crashing Margaret thatchers funeral
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
Randomize
