I just queefed in yoga class and now the old man next to me is smiling at me.
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
ugh i can't even wear this perfume anymore. it just brings back blurry memories of blowjobs and regret.
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
I traded my shirt for vodka. I wonder if my parents can pinpoint where they went wrong raising me.
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
All I've eaten today is cookie dough, pecan pie and three shots of jack. Finals week here I come.
It feels like a bunch of leprechauns are using my brain as a soccer ball
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
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