I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
bitch asked me if i cared if she kept her snuggie on while we had sex
You don't understand, alcohol has become a thing of survival for me and without it I can't function as a normal human being
we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
HEY. That drawer full of booze in my dorm room also has aspirin and Tums in it. So don't tell me I don't care about health.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I sewed up my pants, stole his girlfriends white shirt, and went to work hungover like a responsible adult.
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
You looked at the bouncer while you pissed on the front door of the bar and said...who the fuck are you?
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
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