You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
At least you didnt end up topless in a Tina Turner wig singing cabaret tunes
I'm now at that point where it just feels natural to do a few shots of whisky with breakfast and then head to work
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sorry that I ate boneless ribs off of your sister, but that is no reason to drink my alcohol.
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
I feel like saying your blowjobs are worth a burrito is not the best strategy to get him to be more giving in bed.
I just had to beg some random guy to help me climb through your porch window since the door was locked. FYI...i hear you having sex in there. You could of at least taken a break to unlock the damn door. WTF!!!
My ideal friend would be my dog as a drug dealer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
We exchanged snapchat usernames instead of numbers. Is that what America has come to?
yea sometimes its awkward. but when you're a straight bartender at a gay bar and everyone knows it, they all think that they can make me turn gay. its like oh yea dude that extra $20 tip makes me want to suck some dick now
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
So, Cheetos don't microwave great.
it'll be like the notebook except for with way more of my penis
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