so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
The Rock is playing the tooth fairy. I can't believe I used to smell what that man was cooking
I don't know why people felt they couldn't use the toilet with me passed out in the tub. I shut the curtain. It was like being in another room.
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
I'm at 45 minutes post orgasm, and I still feel my insides spasming. Pretty sure I just fucked Superman.
On a scale of 1-10, how inappropriate is it to sneak into someone's box of sex toys and put googly eyes on their vibrator?
Currently watching high school football on ESPN. Drink every time they say 'this kid's got potential' or 'look at this kid go' or 'atta kid' We're done for..
You thought the flashing lights were strobe lights when they were loading you into the ambulance. You asked the EMT if he had any X.
Vegas never ceases to amaze me. Hung out with a stripper from ATL all night and got nuthin, but the next night meet a bride-to-be who gives me a bj in the elevator.
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
Randomize