happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
I'll never ask another girl to get on top again, that girl from the bar last night got on top and shit diareah all over my ball sack while she was cumming.
Hold on im havin a staring contest with my cat
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
he tried to breastfeed my turtle
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
I don't think of it as I'm taking a pole dancing class...its more like I'm making myself recession proof
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
I totally just somersaulted to the bathroom to avoid moving out of my fetal position
I don't know if I should be concerned or impressed.
Did you know there is a guy on the porch, wrapped in your snuggie, singing no woman no cry and drinking wine coolers?
My passport was stamped in Canada two weeks ago. One step closer to uncovering wtf happened that night
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
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