bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
It was like a lincoln log. Seriously. I don't know who's more pissed, me or my vagina...worst.hookup.ever.
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
I just found that video of you jumping onto my exercise ball feet-first and face-planting into my shoe rack.
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
Also, my phone suggested the phrase “puke in the mailbox" how many times have I had the need to text that to people?
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
God damn you Coronavirus! I'm jonesing I got the itch. I would fully satisfy a horse for some Taco Bell or Perkins. God help me I'm going insane but I definitely don't want to get sick.
Randomize
