I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you wouldn't believe how quickly birth control dissolves in vodka
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
You know you're a fat kid when you've spent half the day having a twitter conversation with Pizza Hut.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
Day two of not drinking, I think my cat is trying to eat me.
Psychosis secondary to sobriety???
I hope dressing like a sexy, but very grown up and intelligent, secretary while out shopping helps disguise how high I am right now.
I'm really sorry I bit your mom last night, it was completely uncalled for.
I skipped the handshake and went right for a dickshake I had him minutes after I saw him.
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