mornings like this make me wish i was morman.
My dad just told me he used to masturbate to cat woman...he then proceeded to beat my brother in beer pong and wont let me play...
just watched paranormal activity stoned. laughed the whole time and screamed when they turned on the lights. eating doritos. I love my life
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
someone stole all your weed so you told us you were planning each of our deaths
So... I may have accidentally just sat on a strip of a home waxing kit.. naked... Assistance is definitely needed....
condom fairy costume came in handy...we were making out in my living room and he wanted it so i took a condom off the costume and we did it right there...with my tutu still on....
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