Haha she couldn't find her dress in the morning. So she left it. How do the hell do I discreetly return that to her at work. More importantly, how did she discreetly do the walk of shame??
i just got a clause named after me in the 'alcohol and drug use' section of the handbook. this is certainly a warning sign.
you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
The words "my birth control fell out" should never be spoken
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
I knew my bag made it because I could smell the fireball that spilled inside of my suitcase before it was on the luggage carousel.
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
I saw a picture of a baby and it reminded me to take my birth control. Priorities
My drug dealer was just on ESPN..
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
Randomize
