i want two things in life...emily to stop talking and a block of cheese.
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet
I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
i have a picture in my phone of you with a bottle of tequila in your back pocket. i believe you were saying "pocket of champions" or something along those lines
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
the number of desperate girls at the gym right now is unfair. it would be cruel not to let one blow me.
i get drunk faster, i spend less money on food, and i'm losing a shit ton of weight. depression and its pills are doing wonders for me
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
I saw seagulls fucking earlier today. What have you done with your life recently?
I tried to flirt with him by saying "catholics are cool" and he handed me a cup of water so i called him jesus and thanked him for the wine
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
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