i just sat at a stop sign for 10 minutes waiting for it to turn green. i need to STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT.
Yeah, the furnace guy just pulled out 4 empty and 1 full beer bottle from the vent. You are no longer allowed over.
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
I demand visitation hours with the duck.
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
If you can get her to make out with you without paying for it, I will personally make you president of the american lesbian league
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
He literally shouted this Viking war cry when he cam. Then as we laid there he sang me the most beautiful rendition of " When Irish Eyes are Smiling". I've never been more confused.
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