she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
Woke up to sesame street reruns and a $62 pizza bill. Never again. I mean it this time.
He keeps trying to sell me the forks from his kitchen drawer
He cooked me dinner. I showed my appreciation by showing up shithoused and breaking a bottle of steak sauce on his floor.
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
I am trying to think of a way to tell him about thanksgiving and the following weekend in a way that makes me sound funny and exciting and not like an alcoholic
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
I got really upset at the McDonald's worker. They should serve nuggets 24/7. Apparently 5am is breakfast for some people.
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
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