How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
Hi, I just found this phone under my seat at a brewers game and seeing as you're entered in as 'fillllatio' I figured I'd ask you if you know the illiterate ass who owns this phone. Thanks :)
Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
You know me. Don't need roses, just dick and food.
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
All I know is that I'm not gonna send out SOS messages via twitter for your rescue this time.
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
If there was a card that said "I'm sorry for throwing up on your bathroom counter" I would send it to you.
Yeah ok. We can maid of honor each other since you don't like my boobs enough to lesbian marry me
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
It's starting to get sad how I have this 'new beginning' feeling after every negative pregnancy test
Randomize
