how was your day?
fuck the small talk. are you bringing the liquor tonight or am i?
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
FUCK BUDDYS DON'T HOLD HANDS. NO EXCEPTIONS.
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
Came home from this girls horse at 6am to find a guy lighting off roman candles in front of my door. Best walk of fame I've ever had.
im too broke to be in a relationship this close to the holidays
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
It's not even 8 pm, or Saint Patrick's Day, and Kevin is drunk on my roof humping the air
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