I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
I love how my brain works. It's like being on drugs without the costly upkeep.
k so who do I think I'm kidding applying to culinary school? I just fucked up a microwaveable pizza
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
This girl told me she was a virgin the other day. I felt like I was talking to a unicorn.
I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
Dude you make losing your phone an art. You left it balancing on a two liter bottle in the kitchen. Wtf
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
You know when you blow me it's the softest, most amazing feeling ever. Like putting my dick in a silk bag filled with puppy ears.
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
Randomize
