i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
sellin beer in gallon jugs is both the best and worst idea ever. Im only gonna have one beer...but its gonna be 128 ounces.
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
Fuck now we have to have sex
What?
In a bet, need to win
He kept buying me shots of tequila. I decided to just save myself the half hour of toilet hugging and tell him straight up that I intended on sleeping with him. We got Tacos on the way home with all the money we saved.
Why is everyone in the bowling alley looking at me like i'm a prostitute just because I have bunny ears on?
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
Some girl came up to us crying that she lost her phone and you said "if it's meant to be, let it be"
I know you just got dumped by your gf but believe there is still good in the world. I just smoked a joint and took a fucking unbelievable poop. Give me a call tomorrow.
Hey I know we haven't talked in a while, but I wanted to thank you for those m&ms you bought me for Christmas. Sorry I never got you anything then broke up with you.
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
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