We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
Say "Steve Buscemi is hot." with a straight face.
theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
you'll be glad to know I got kicked off the microphone at a bar in Breckenridge last night thanks to my country rendition of all star
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Found your glasses drenched in ketchup on my driveway this morning
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
I found my keys in the basement freezer. Drunk me is a sneaky little bastard.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
Mom called last night while I was at the bar and asked where I was. I told her I was on the highway to the danger zone while the guys were humming the top gun theme.
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
There might be a dead possum in your bed, your roomate is extremely distressed!
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
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