he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
Red Bull/Vodka? You bet I'm showing everyone my penis tonight.
The thing is you're all "holy crap this isn't nearly as bad as I thought pissing on my own face would be."
Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
All I can remember is posting my chicken burger in the post box. Postman is in for a treat.
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
If I am telling you about the details of the shits I take I probably don't want to have sex with you. Probably.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Enroute to my place eta 6 mikes...estimated time until intoxicated? 45 mikes. Commence the timer.
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
I gave him one of my famous hand jobs.
Randomize