I just realized i haven't had sex in 2009. oh man thats embarrassing.
so last night my mother drunkenly told me that maybe the reason why I want to be a vet was because I was conceived doggy style.
I wish I could attach your penis to someone I like more than you.
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
Just saw out breathalyzer tubes from last night on the side of the road. Glad the cop let us know that they are biodegradable
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
well they never fully had sex so she's like an eskimo step-sister. I'll make a family tree for you.
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
It's less than a hour into 2020 and I already want to punch some people in the face
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