yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
The polish Muslims are throwin paczkis into the crowd and I'm beer 6 before 11 am
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
The girl that works the front desk at my gym invited me and my friend to come see her Tuesday during her shift at hooters because its her birthday. I still have a boner
I woke up and the only 2 bowls I own were shattered on my floor. Pretty sure my hand and tailbone are broken and I have no idea what the fuck happened
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
Is this like a preordered booty call?
Last time I "ran into him" I ended up with the clap and had to explain why the ladder was missing from the garage.
You said, "I'll have this whole island inside of you by 6 AM. Just point out who you want and I'll make it happen."
it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
Randomize
