Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
my ass hurt today after the party last night. I wnt to the doctors and they found a coin in a ziplock bag with a note from you. WHAT THE FUCK DID U DO TO ME???
You kept hiding marshmallows in the freezer saying "they would never think to look here"
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
Broke up w/ my married coworker...work is gonna get weird.
if that's jizz on my steering wheel i'm gonna be pissed...and impressed.
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
If I can't pick up a cat lady, I probably need to turn to Internet dating.
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
Dude in front of me just jumped out of line at Starbucks to go puke. Vegas in prime form.
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
Eating pizza in the bath tub while watching a romantic comedy alone. I reached a new level of single.
Randomize
