Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
my boyfriend just told me he used to have genital herpes. I was gonna have sex with him, but now it's SOOO over.
what kind of stupid fuck tells you that BEFORE sex? he is definitely not a keeper.
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
He blended the pizza with water and drank the whole thing. He is my hangover hero
What's the address?
Too drunk. Just google it.
IT'S YOUR HOUSE
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
Actually I more feel like I'm on a ship about to grab the holy grail off an island
The ship is me being high the holy grail is some profound idea I'm about to have
Turns out he has a 6pack too. Alright adorable snapchatting manwhore dude, you win.
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
you put your keys in the fridge so you wouldn't forget your yoohoo
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
Granted, I did not plan to spend ANY hour of the last day of 2020 sober.
Randomize
