id be glad to
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
I told him I had my daily dose of vitamin c so i wouldn't blow him
and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
Well the party says they're going to have three kegs and four trampolines. I think I'm going to invite my EMT buddies just to be safe.
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
Take this only to mean that we love you, but we're having a serious, half-hour, hypothetical discussion about how far we think we could throw you.
pouring popcorn down my shirt before we went to the bar was the best idea ever. it was delicious and convenient.
Hey, can you come over and kill me real quick
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
My vibrator looks like a lipstick tube. So does my mace. I just realized the potential problems of keeping them both in the same bag.
But lunch with my dad really just means an hour and a half of him telling me how he's disappointed and how he knows I'm on drugs
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
Randomize
