Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
This is how my night is going so far. The bartender bought our last two rounds and I'm chasing a bee around the bar with a foam bat.
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
About to be a 4Loko vomit fountain in 45 seconds, what color will it be? Animated birds will fly out of me.
I'm still pretty stoned. There are mini rice cakes in my robe pocket to snack on in the shower.
Do you know how hard it is to be while you're high with a chuck Norris poster in the bathroom?
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
I just watched some kid bang his girlfriend and I was like whatever I'll just sit here and do all your fucking drugs that's fine
I told the cops they couldn't arrest me until they found my shoe. Now I have the grant county cops looking for my heels by the rail road tracks.
Her handjob consisted of slapping me in the balls. I am never hooking up with her ever again ever.
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