when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
my mom just asked me what a queef is. she needs to stop watching south park
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
WHAT KIND OF DUMPSTER DOESNT HAVE PIZZA IN IT?
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
Perhaps if I didn't mortify my parents last night with my drunken obnoxious behavior which resulted in the casualty of an entire decorative bathroom shelf which I completely ripped off the wall and left for dead, I would be more than willing to go day drinking.
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
I was just like oh sorry I'm peeling meanwhile my legs are on either side of his head and I look like a fucking Komodo dragon
I never thought people would keep their guns next to their fake plastic penises, but there they were.
who orders an old fashioned in 2014? even my Grandparents think you're an asshole.
Just because I'm sleeping with him doesn't mean I'm in love with him, it means that I want to have sex with someone who isn't a serial killer.
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
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