Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
disregard all texts ive sent you minus taco motherfucking bell
just found a piece of pizza in my dresser.....i remember you saying you were going to save one for later so i'm assuming this is your doing
Wait wait wait. I remember riding in her car to the next bar. On your lap. With my head on the dashboard. That probably should have been my cut off point.
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
After we got done he told me to hold his penis because it helps him fall asleep
I just want to drink cheap wine and throw my bra at an aging singer songwriter
Can I fire a pigeon out of a t shirt gun?
Something must have happened, they started yelling truffle butter and you said we needed to leave NOW
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
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