I wanted to tell him he wasn't actually in me, but my god, awkward?
i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
You going out tonight?
No I am at the hospital. Throwing up blood is apparently frowned upon.
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
My ideal friend would be my dog as a drug dealer
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
You should not have followed "the guy who peed in my bed" with "he smells good."
I texted her that I burned my tongue drinking coffee so it hurt to talk or kiss... How many points do I get for doing her without talking or making out first?
You do realize last night you asked me if shampoo had an expiration date then cried for 15 mins when I told you it did
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