You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
Just for future reference, me asking if you're free, followed by a winking face is not my way of suggesting a tandem bike ride.
Also cheers for the reminder to check last night's texts. It's been a magical adventure through drunk me's thought process.
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
I'm really going to need you to stop yelling Campari.