How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
How has he not realized you're pregnant?
Spanx.
Gave out candy dressed as a porn star...bet you can guess how the mothers kept reacting.
he emptied an entire bag of goldfish onto the bed and rolled around yelling the theme to jaws trying to eat them
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
Upon further investigation it turns out it wasn't blood, but chocolate frosting from the cupcake I shoved in my pocket to "save for later"
The low-flow toilet at my office cannot handle the intensity of this hangover.
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
I just ordered $70 worth of pizza and I'm not even ashamed. Happy Valentine's Day to me.
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
Randomize