yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
separated laundry into 'got laid' and 'didn't get laid' piles.
It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
He acted like he was sleep fucking because I woke up to him screwing me in the middle of the night and he had is eyes closed and was mumbling things the whole time and wouldn't respond to me.
Is that even possible?
I called him by the wrong name to test him and he instantly stopped, rolled over and acted like he was still sleeping...I think he might break up with me tomorrow.
Like there's an 87% chance I'll end up on the bedroom floor demanding sex while freestyling in your face. I'm going to buy rum.
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
ok give me a pep talk, I want a hotdog but I'm too stoned to go make it
He gave me a box of cheez-its after sex, does that make me a hooker?
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
I think I left my thong in your bed. Careful. It has the power to destroy the agitator on a washing machine
Randomize
