it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
Fuck men. I'm going to go eat a package of cookie dough and get fat. I hope I die of salmonella.
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
There was definitely a significant amount of cookie dough in my bra
No he exists. Who else tells me no matter how drunk I am to pull out. He's watching over me so my bastard doesn't get created.
you know it's a good party when the fucking floor caves in. THE FUCKING FLOOR.
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
Would giving a bouquet of flowers to my mother be a good way to say, "sorry you walked in on my boyfriend eating me out"?
Did you put candle wax on my balls last night?
Morning! Im using your rent money to snort percocet.
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
Randomize
