so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
IM A DRUNK BIRTHDAY CLEOPATRA MESS. CELEBRATE THAT BITCH
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
Mom looked at me, frowned, and said "it makes me sad to see you drink before noon.." So i told her if she doesn't like it she needs to stop waking me up before noon.
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
You sent me a picture of curly fries with no explanation attached. This is the first time you've texted me in 2 months.
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
Yeah, so, that moment when the repair guy comes in and you see your cock ring on the counter one second before he does.
I mean, he'll either figure it the fuck out or set my apartment on fire. Either way, it will be entertaining.
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