This cookie i'm eating tastes like pizza. It was so worth contacting my sister for pot.
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
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I fell asleep at the bar. And the bouncer threw a snowball at my face.
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
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Just watched a guy get through airport security with a full bottle of captain morgan. In my head the entire airport cheered.
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
It looked like Halloween in bed... BECAUSE HE BIT MY PUSSY AND I BLED ALL OVER THE FUCKING PLACE. THEN HE FELL AND BROKE HIS TOE. AND THEN PASSED OUT WHEN HE SAW ALL OF THE BLOOD.
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived
Just asphyxiate me and toss my corpse in the Ocean. It'll be easier than whatever the next four or eight years will bring.
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
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