Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
I'm not going to blow you while you look at fish on the internet.
Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
DON'T LET IAN EAT HIS PEANUT BUTTER!!!
Just remembered that I poured a whole bottle of tylenol in there. It's chunky. It's deadly.
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
Why Weren't you wearing pants?
because pants are for people with no imagination
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
There is an alarming amount of food in my bra.
I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest.
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
The only thing I want for my birthday is a divorce from you.
Dude i woke up today by a pile of fried chicken and wearing a bra
.......stop going to frat parties....
Randomize
