But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
3 a.m. laundry plus 100 proof peppermint schnapps does not turn out well. Not only is there a puddle of detergent outside the laundry room that I spilled, but my clothes were found in the dryer wit a box of Franzia and a 40. Good thing I was too drunk to turn it on.
Ok but if you die you have to get "I should've listened to Mike" carved into your tombstone
Just found weed in an empty handle. Who knew Capitan Morgan was also a gardener?
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
Dude, never piss off a hungover boss.
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
Cancel your plans for the fourth someone is streaming iron chef on twitch
Randomize
