I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
I keep finding coffee grounds in my vagina
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
i'm gonna crowd surf you onto his dick
PS: bike ride of shame at 7am includes riding by kids waiting for the school bus #classy
I woke up this morning next to my computer with Google search results for "how to put out a fire."
I'm very scared to turn around.
Dude, no, you tried to sleep on the stove. I mean. You were pissed when I stopped you... but I couldn't have you catching on fire in my house.
How do I tell this guy that if he does not like the condoms at my apartment, he should bring his own without sounding like a sure thing?
Say it's BYOC night at the beach. And, you are a sure thing. Own it.
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
Randomize
